You can also download the whole course by clicking here.
Because we’re all delicate flowers, aren’t we? After dealing with this stuff for 8 years, I have a few things figured out. Let Rebecca woman-splain you what it’s all about:
Rejection issues are a big ole’ can of worms!
Are you afraid of worms? No? Great! You might need to ditch your pity parties and go waaay out of your mental, social, and emotional comfort zones. That’s seriously wormy territory. Only brave people are allowed to enter.
But it’s cool. I know you can handle this. As my mama used to say, worms are more afraid of you than you are of them. (Okay, she said that about scary-as-shit spiders, but it’s the same concept.)
Also, be sure to browse the comments! DWT readers have posted loads of wisdom to help you out.
Are You Doing It Wrong?
Perhaps one or two small changes are all you need.
Part 1: The Curse of the Entitled Dancer. First things first: Dancing with another person is a privilege, a gift! Adopt this mindset and you’ll automatically avoid much of the pain of rejection. High fives!!
Part 2: Should You Ask Them to Dance? The New Flow Chart! Some people are more likely to say yes. Some are more likely to say no. This is an organized, systematic approach to sorting out who to ask.
Part 3: 27 Best Ways to Get Rejected at a Dance. Of course, some methods of asking just don’t work well. Read this post to see if your asking method turns people off. This post also explains the most successful method:
Practice this until you can do it in your sleep.
Raise Your Hand If You Want More Friends!
Joining the dance community can feel socially intimidating. The more friends you have, the less rejected you will feel. Guaranteed or your money back.
Part 4: The 3 Kinds of Dancers and How to Make Friends With Them. Different dancers have different social needs. Here’s a strategy for how to start and grow your social circle.
Part 5: Why the Cool People Aren’t Talking to You Yet. Hint: It’s probably not because they are assholes. Before you say something you’ll regret, read this post.
Part 6: 23 Ways to Start a Conversation With Any Lindy Hopper. There are plenty more, but these are a good start! I began dancing as a shy, socially anxious introvert. Now I can make whole lists of things to talk about. Look at me go!
Part 7: How to Say “No” Without Making Other Dancers Secretly Hate You. Eventually, you will have to reject people too. Will you do it kindly, or will you commit the same behaviors that caused you so much angst as a newbie?
Just Don’t Be Creepy
It’s really uncool.
Part 8: Do People Secretly Think You’re Creepy? Dancers don’t like creeps. Read this to make sure you’re not inadvertently crossing someone’s boundaries.
Your Turn to Share!
Other dancers can benefit from your experience. Be brave and share your opinion!
What did you like? What did you hate? Use the comments below to get angry and blame me for everything that’s wrong with the dance scene (yes, that really happens sometimes). Or share your latest revelations and/or stories of enlightenment.
P.S. If you’re a newbie, you may wish to check out my book, The Beginner Dancer’s Survival Guide.